Charisma, is it as simple as being born with “rizz” or can you become it?

Written by: Karina Bean

Reading time: 6 Minutes

Welcome to the era of personal and professional PR, where catching attention takes more than just a flashy outfit or a clever tagline. It’s all about charisma! Picture that magnetic quality that sets certain folks apart, drawing others in with an irresistible allure. Yep, that’s it – the charm that captivates, the confidence that inspires, and the presence that commands attention. No wonder the 2023 Oxford word of the year was ‘rizz’ – a catchy short form for charisma, popularised by online sensation Kai Cenat.

But what is this ‘rizz’ exactly? It’s a relatively new term, buzzing around online since 2021, but it’s caught on like wildfire. Whether it’s about self-assurance, smooth-talking skills, or just exuding cool vibes, ‘rizz’ is hard to pin down but impossible to miss. Everyone might have their own take on what ‘rizz’ means, but there are some universally acknowledged ‘rizz’ experts out there.

The enigma of charisma

Now, let’s dive into the heart of the matter – where does charisma come from? Some folks think it’s a mystery, but let’s demystify it a bit:

Charisma isn’t just about being born with a silver tongue or a magnetic personality. It’s rooted in values and feelings, a complex mix of traits and behaviours that make someone truly captivating.

Sure, there’s Aristotle talking about logos, ethos, and pathos – the magical ingredients for persuading others. But here’s the kicker: charisma isn’t some ancient secret; it’s a blend of natural talent and learned skills. Scholars and everyday people alike have debated whether charisma is something you’re born with or something you develop.

Are we naturally born charmers, or can we charm our way to the top through practice and self-awareness?

Let’s take a trip down memory lane to 1936 when Dale Carnegie first penned “How to Win Friends and Influence People.” It was a game-changer, suggesting that charisma wasn’t just reserved for the lucky few; it was a skill that could be learned and mastered by anyone willing to put in the effort.

Characteristics of Charismatic Individuals

Now that we’ve scratched the surface, let’s explore what makes charismatic individuals tick. What sets them apart from the crowd and makes them so darn captivating? Well, it turns out they share a few key characteristics:

• Charm: They’ve got that special something that makes people gravitate towards them. Whether it’s their infectious smile, sparkling wit, or genuine warmth, they’ve got a way of making everyone feel welcome.
• Eloquence: Charismatic individuals are master communicators, both verbally and nonverbally. They’ve got a way with words that can captivate a room and a knack for reading social cues that puts everyone at ease.
• Authenticity: They’re not afraid to be themselves, flaws and all. They’re comfortable in their own skin and don’t try to put on airs or pretend to be someone they’re not. What you see is what you get, and people can’t help but respect that.
• Empathy: They’ve got a sixth sense when it comes to understanding others’ thoughts and feelings. They’re great listeners who genuinely care about what you have to say, and they’re always there with a shoulder to lean on or a word of encouragement when you need it most.
• Confidence: Last but not least, they’ve got a healthy dose of self-assurance that commands respect. They walk into a room like they own the place, and people can’t help but sit up and take notice.

Is Charisma Innate or Acquired?

So, we’ve established what charisma looks like, but here’s the million-dollar question: is it something you’re born with, or can you learn to be charismatic? Some folks believe that charisma is an innate quality, something you either have or you don’t. They point to examples throughout history of charismatic leaders who seemed to effortlessly command the attention and admiration of others from a young age.

Take Martin Luther King Jr., Mahatma Gandhi, or Winston Churchill, for example.From the moment they stepped onto the world stage, they had a magnetic presence and innate charisma that set them apart from their peers. But here’s the thing – while some people may have a natural predisposition towards charisma, that doesn’t mean it’s exclusively reserved for the lucky few born with natural charm.In fact, numerous studies in psychology and social science suggest that charisma is a skill that can be developed and enhanced through deliberate effort and practice. Sure, some folks might have a head start, but with a little hard work and self-awareness, anyone can learn to be charismatic.

How to Rizz Up

Now, let’s get down to business – how do you crank up your ‘rizz’ factor? It’s not just about having the gift of gab or a dazzling smile; it’s about honing those skills and traits that make you stand out in a crowd.

1. Listen up! Charismatic individuals aren’t just great talkers; they’re fantastic listeners too. Practice active listening – it’s not just about hearing; it’s about truly understanding what someone is saying.
2. Emotional Intelligence: Get in touch with your emotions and learn to read the room. Emotional intelligence is the secret sauce behind charisma – it’s all about connecting with others on a deeper level.
3. Body Language: Want to ooze confidence? Stand tall, smile big, and use your body language to show you’re approachable and confident.
4. Find Common Ground: Want to build rapport? Find common interests, shared experiences, or mutual goals to connect with others on a personal level.
5. Tell Stories: Everyone loves a good story! Whether it’s sharing your own experiences or weaving a captivating narrative, storytelling is a powerful tool for engaging others.
6. Keep It Real: Authenticity is key. Be genuine, be yourself, and let your unique personality shine through.
7. Develop Charismatic Habits: Cultivate positivity, express gratitude, and spread good vibes wherever you go.
8. Speak with Confidence: Whether it’s giving a speech or just speaking up in a meeting, confidence is key. Practice speaking clearly and confidently to make your voice heard.
9. Build Confidence: Confidence isn’t something you’re born with; it’s something you build. Set goals, face challenges head-on, and celebrate your successes along the way.

Learn and Grow: Seek feedback, observe charismatic individuals you admire, and never stop learning and growing.

Whether you call it ‘rizz’ or plain old charisma, it’s a blend of nature and nurture but clearly not solely the domain of the genetically gifted. It’s important to remember that developing charisma is a journey, and progress may take time and effort, but with persistence and dedication you can cultivate your own magnetic presence and master making a lasting impact on those around you. I leave you with this free downloadable resource infographic to take on your quest for rizz:

By embracing your unique qualities, honing your skills, and connecting with others on a deeper level, you can unlock your full ‘rizz’ potential and make a lasting impact wherever you go. So, go ahead – unleash your inner charmer and let your ‘rizz’ shine bright!

References:

https://www.pinktuition.com/career/the-most-comprehensive-article-on-personal-branding-for-women

https://languages.oup.com/word-of-the-year/2023/  

https://www.dictionary.com/e/slang/rizz/

https://edition.cnn.com/us/rizz-meaning-explained-cec/index.html

https://www.vox.com/culture/23989120/rizz-definition-oxford-word-of-the-year-colloquial

https://pressbooks.pub/openrhetoric/chapter/aristotles-rhetorical-appeals

https://hbr.org/2012/06/learning-charisma-2

https://www.dalecarnegie.com/en/course-finder

https://journals.aom.org/doi/10.5465/amle.2010.0012

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